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About Naples

Wot gets me goat, though? Them snobs who reckon it’s low-class. Oi, mate, loosen up! Had me ragin’ once—some toff in Westminster bangin’ on about “decency,” while I’m like, “Bruv, chill, it’s just a massage with extras!” Happy as a pig in muck, I’d be, sprawled out, oil drippin’, some bird whisperin’ sweet nothings. Surprised me, too—didn’t expect it’d be so… posh-like? Thought it’d be all seedy, but nah, some places are swanky—marble floors, the lot!

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I start freaking out, thinking I’m gonna have to walk home. But then I see this kid, maybe 10 years old, riding my bike down the street. I’m like, “Hey! That’s my bike!” He just looks at me, grinning like he’s won the lottery. I chase after him, and it turns into this epic scene. I finally catch up, and I’m outta breath.